"When I'm in Dire Need"

I'll get right down to the point
I was tokin' on a joint
when that Trooper caught the corner of my eye
I was movin' kinda fast
so I backed off the gas
hopin' desperately he'd let me go by

I got down to 65
when those blue lights came alive
so I ate the roach and pulled off the road
He was on me in a flash
too late to hide my stash
so I just started slingin' Old Spice Cologne

B:
When I'm in dire need
to camaflague my vice
Nothin' kills the smell of weed
like that good Ol' Spice

He just sat there for a spell
got me paranoid as hell
Then I thought about the "HighTimes" on the dash
If he saw that I'd be done
he'd search the car and find my bong
and that Hefty bag of mushrooms in the back

B:
When I'm in dire need
and I'm facin' time in jail
I call up good ol' Triple A
to come and post my bail

Of all the cops in town
I had to run into this clown
back in high-school he was a redneck and a snob
but then he grabbed my sack of weed
said I reckon thats all I need
and don't look so shocked its one of the perks of my job

B:
cause when I'm in dire need
and I'm runnin' out of stash
I wait on old friends just like you
and save myself some cash
so nice of you to share your bag of weed
now I'll know who to call on
When I'm in dire need

2008\Ron Kauffman...aka...Rockin' Rollo...aka... Kosmic Kauffman